Words to Mark a Family
How do you honor the life of someone who meant so much in 500 words or less? This was the only thought on repeat in my mind after being asked to write her eulogy. Just gather a thought. Write something. Anything. 500 words or less? Seriously? This was my mind for about six hours before writing even a simple sentence.
I was honored to have even been considered as someone who could do these words justice, and being able to write them was one of the many times over the following days when I would feel so deeply the nearness of the Father.
When I (finally) cleared my head enough to write, the very first thing that made it onto a painfully blank piece of paper was “love you more.” Most times my first thought to make the page never makes the final cut, but these did, and little did I know those words would be the ones that resonated with everyone. She would respond to any variation of “I love you” with those words, you could count on it. And I would soon discover those were the final words she said to many - the final words she said to me - the words her sister and I have tattooed in her handwriting - the words that mark our family.
Before writing, I sat with two close friends asking how to write in a way that would reach each generation and relationship impacted by her love. Trying to center my heart on what I knew to be true of how she loved so much bigger than herself and wanting to honor that, while also attempting to create space for hundreds of broken hearts to find comfort in the words I was entrusted to write.
In the last year, I’ve thought so much about all that was omitted from her eulogy. I remember weeping as it was read, fearful that not enough of who we all loved was represented within the words. Thinking I left out how horrible of a driver she was — this isn’t ill-intended, she totaled three cars within one month and everyone in her town knew to never park near her. How somehow it was left out that her brother was the best friend she ever knew. Or the way Jesus restored her heart, and in the process so many relationships in the last year of her life, showing all of us how beautiful forgiveness is when it’s that authentic - as it’s meant to be. How she was witty even when it was kept to herself…she had a note on her phone with a list of things to buy “when I’m rich” and at the very top was a hot pink VW bug. We laughed so hard reading it, knowing how serious she was about it. Priorities. How hundreds of people came to the hospital for her donor walk, speaking very little but so loudly that she was loved. She was loved. She was loved. And how every carefully written word could have been rewritten a hundred times and would never reach who she was to all of us. And how somehow…it was perfect.
Some of the words to honor her:
Angelica Paige Randolph, born on February 20, 2003, of Dayton, Tennessee, passed away at 19 years old on March 1, 2022, surrounded by those who loved her most.
Angelica never once thought of herself first. She loved larger than life in every circumstance, ensuring her family and friends always knew she “loved them more.” She had the quickest wit and could make an entire room laugh within moments of joining a conversation. Her playful personality connected her with every generation, from babies to the elderly. Her ability to nap at any time during the day did the same. Angelica’s generosity continues through her organ donation, where her deep love for those around her, resembling the love of Christ, will carry on.
“The loss is immeasurable, but so is the love left behind” - Unknown